How are Kevin and I Coping?
This picture was taken on a Saturday, the day after Kevin's birthday in 2000 -- which had been the very day I was told I had breast cancer. In two days, I would face radical mastectomy surgery. Then chemo and radiation. We had no idea what would lie ahead or if we'd come through it.
In other words, uterine cancer isn't our first cancer rodeo.
What makes it hardest is the people dearest to me who care enough to want to know every detail of every doctor's appointment. I appreciate that concern and care enough to answer questions and offer information, but in the background, I have the feeling of being stuck in the doctor's office, needing to repeat the outcome over and over and over in each subsequent conversation. How many times have I had to write or to say aloud "I have been diagnosed with uterine cancer"? How many times has my husband had to hear that in the past few days? Too many.
I informed my children first, and then my sisters, and then my closest friends in Madison and Florida, and Bev in California, and, and, and... Kevin hears the same story, over and over, with every phone call or text (I text using the voice option, unfortunately for him). It's like we can't escape the cancer cloud and yet we know that these very people will be so important to my treatment and we DO want them to know what is going on. But telling each and every one all of the details separately is exhausting. And I am not up to the task.
SO... I'm going to personally update Summer (my nurse daughter), my children Brook and PJ, my sisters and that's it.
However, I'm also going to do what I did to help me win the last rodeo -- I'm going to post a cancer journal which will be updated as things are updated -- as we have more information. I promise to do it faithfully. In return, I don't want to discuss those findings or procedures with anyone else outside of this blog. Cancer is negative. The treatment is ugly. And I need all of my strength and blessings to face that challenge. I can't have it drained by talking about what lies in front of us or how we are doing. We ARE doing. We are taking each minute together as it comes. And in those minutes, we intend to find happiness.
I'm going to concentrate on seeing people I love, doing the things that are important to me moment by moment, and living my life, however long the Lord sees to bless me with it.
Meanwhile, I do believe in the power of prayer and your prayers and love are returned and appreciated more than you will ever know. I also appreciate your following this blog as we go into this rodeo together.